When I lacked active listening, I learned that it was mainly around topics where I was not interested about or I had a lot on my plate that I just couldn't focus on something else. When I give feedback, I open the floor for other people to share what's going on for them, so I don't jump directly with assumptions. If there is something that needs to be changed in making the topics more engaging, or working on reducing the workload, I would focus on that and see if the active listening improves over time. If these 2 are not the issue, I would start understanding what they like to listen to, what struggles they might have to actively listening. Because we all know to listen when something interests us

When I notice a colleague struggling with active listening, I approach the conversation with empathy and a focus on collaboration. I try to choose a time when we're both relaxed and not under pressure. Instead of pointing out flaws directly, I frame my feedback around shared goals and how strong communication can help us get there. I might say something like, “I’ve noticed in some conversations, ideas sometimes get missed, and I think we could work even better together if we focused more on fully hearing each other out.” I also make sure to highlight their strengths so it doesn’t feel like criticism. My aim is to keep the tone respectful and solution-oriented, so the feedback feels like support rather than judgment.

I approach it with empathy and clarity. I choose a private setting and share specific examples, focusing on how improved listening can enhance collaboration and outcomes. I frame it as a growth opportunity, not a critique—offering tips like summarizing others’ points or asking clarifying questions. The goal is to support, not criticize.

I’d choose a calm, private moment to share how their listening impacts collaboration. I’d use “I” statements—like, “I’ve noticed sometimes I feel unheard in our conversations”—and offer a solution, such as, “It might help if we recap key points together.” The goal isn’t blame—it’s mutual growth.

From my experience, when someone struggles with active listening, I don’t jump straight to calling it out. Instead, I try to highlight how it’s affecting the flow of work or decision-making. Something like, “Hey, I’ve noticed in a couple of meetings we’ve had, some key points have slipped through — I think if we both stay a bit more tuned in, we’ll avoid misalignment and save time.” It’s not about criticism — it’s about improving how we work together. Framing it around impact and shared outcomes usually gets the message across without making it personal.

Listening is a function of indulgence. If my colleagues are not listening to me that means my communication is landing to them as something non interesting. The best way to deal with this is first get to the source of it, this will give you an understanding of why it’s happening. To give feedback, get your colleagues on call and have an authentic conversation about what you are observing, and what’s the impact on you, on the ongoing project and also its impact on their efficiency as well. Honestly point out how this will impacting your relations and their personal growth. All this must be done without making them wrong. If they request training, then train them on re-recreation and listening. Have an empowering conversation.

KEEP IT SIMPLE — DIRECT BUT RESPECTFUL FOCUS ON IMPACT, NOT BLAME USE “I NOTICED” — NOT “YOU ALWAYS” OFFER A TOOL OR TACTIC THEY CAN APPLY FEEDBACK IS A GIFT — DELIVER IT CLEAN — ARISTOS PANTELI, ULTRA ATHLETE

Clearly outline what the issue is. Give examples of what the issue is or was then suggest clear boundaries and next steps to resolve. If all else fails record and document and include HR. Sometimes it’s a case of your voice is not enough.